The week that broke my nails and my heart...

This week I made this huge life changing move basically up the country to a new city I’ve never been before where I only know 3 people, two of which are ex boyfriends. HA. Some people say it’s exciting, others are scared for me, some don’t understand and some think I’m insane. But let’s be real- I was in a dead end job, not making enough money to sign a lease on my own, in a city I didn’t want to live in but was forced back to with no other options, living a life I felt wasn’t getting me anywhere. I started looking for jobs in other cities that were still close enough to family, but also not in Memphis. And I found an amazing one (I don’t even remember how I found the listing for this job), and I applied on a whim, not thinking I would actually get it, and I did. And now, two months later, I’m living in this huge, confusing, brand new city, with no one to guide me or help me through except myself.

My apartment is cute, I'm excited to have a place of my own for once, and a life of my own. I can sit in the living room at midnight watching TV if I want and there's no one I will be bothering except whoever I decide to text at that time. The move was easy enough, but now it's the unpacking that is the hard part.

I don’t have much to say about my job yet- I haven’t started yet. But from what I can tell it will basically be a lateral shift in assignment and duties, but a major upgrade in everything else.

So many people have had so many thoughts on my life and how to live it and what I need to do. And for whatever reason, in a brief moment of insanity haha, I decided to not care anymore. I decided to do this for myself. I decided and realized that I am literally the only person who is living my life. So this last year: When I didn’t want to marry the person I was engaged to, I called it off. I returned the ring to him and I moved on with my life. When I didn’t want to stay in the job I was working anymore, I looked around, found a new one. When I didn’t want to live in the city I was living in anymore, I moved. I have had mixed feelings of it all. But we never grow as people if we don’t take the chances. So I did. And even though I’m going through a bit of a rough patch, I know this move will be for the best in the long run. I know that finally living my life for me and not for everyone else’s approval will take me so much farther than playing it safe, in my comfort zone, leading me to a struggling, boring existence.

Life is what we make it. Don’t like something? Change it! There are always other options out there, and if you think you need a better one, then find it. Don’t get stuck with a person or in a place that doesn’t make you excited to wake up in the mornings. Find a home that makes you feel your most welcome, find a job that you like doing, and find a person who when you think about them- it makes you smile. Take the leap, make the change, and find your happiness. I promise you won’t regret it.